Yesterday while on flight to Chicago I was waiting in line to go to the bathroom.

A women walked out and I smiled at her, her response was to say “I am sorry”.

I was baffled, what was she sorry for? for needing to go to the bathroom before me? For being in my way? I am not really sure.

So I spent the rest of my travel day noticing how many women I encountered who said they were sorry and how many men did, and for what. My own little social experiment.

I think you can guess what I found. Men said they were sorry when they actually did something they were sorry for, like bump in to someone. Women on the other hand said sorry for every thing, and I mean everything.

I noticed my own patterns as well and how I had changed. When I lived in Israel I was always considered the polite one, I would always say sorry when I bumped in to someone or cut them off by mistake, in Israel I was an exception. Since I moved to the US I find that I have adopted the local culture, I say I am sorry all the time.

Why do we feel the need to say we are sorry all the time? it feels like we are apologizing for our existence. And even if we are not, there is something about saying sorry all the time that makes me feel like I did something wrong.

Do you say you’re sorry all the time? Does your daughter? Does saying I am sorry still have the same impact if we say it all the time?

What message are we sending our daughters by teaching them to say “I am sorry” all the time?

I would like to challenge you to start a local campaign starting in your own house.

Create a chart in your kitchen and for the next week mark down every time you say, “I am sorry” when you did not really have to.

Noticing our patterns is the first step in creating change.

Lets together start believing in ourselves and showing the world we do!

Much Love and Support

Tova

P.S. look out for the email about the up coming Parenting Teens Summit 2015, if you want to get notices about all the calls you have to sign up!